Foolish Games

Kyliska could not believe she ran into Selenthiel in Silvermoon last night. She shouldn't be so foolish. She had to be more careful. She had been sneaking away to see Tiandril in Silvermoon in random bars and whatnot, but nothing had happened other than their kiss in the woods. Kyli just had wanted to talk to Tiandril as friends. She had kept her promise to herself to do nothing more with him.

Kyli decided to go for a walk again. She liked to do that to clear her mind. She had to admit that her thoughts did often turn to Ti, more so than Andi since their steamy kiss together. Kyli knew that she did not initiate the kiss, but she didn't stop it in time. She should have stopped it right away. She let it go too far. She sighed as she walked along the path through Eversong Forest. The birds were singing and the sun was shining very brightly. She took a nice deep breath to just relish in what a glorious day it was. She found herself walking deeper and deeper into the woods.

Kyli was wearing a light dress since the weather was so nice. She could have sworn that she heard wind chimes, which always made her shudder but then as soon as she thought she heard them, they were gone. She shook her head as she continued to walk, now she went off of the path into the grass. Here the trees were so tall and were sort of blocking out the sun. 'This is a good spot to sit and relax' Kyli thought to herself. As she was getting ready to sit next to a tree she looked out to the pond that was in front of her. She had not realized at first that it was even there. She also didn't realize that someone was there.

Kyli did a double take. It was a male Blood Elf, and he was naked, apparently bathing or just having a nice private swim. Kyli was frozen as she realized who this naked elf was. It was Tiandril. She had her mouth half way open and realized that she was staring at him. His whole body was beautiful, just as beautiful as his face was. Tiandril's back was to Kyli so he didn't even realize that she was there watching him. She let out a slight gasp, and then he turned around to see who was there. He didn't seem embarrassed in the least even before he realized that it was Kyli. Once he did recognize her, he smiled at her and stared back at her. Then very slowly his eyes went up and down the length of her body, as if mentally undressing her right there.

Kyli's breath caught in her throat. She knew she should turn away and not stare at Ti's naked body. She should run away as fast as she could. But she found herself walking slowly towards him. The emotions she had been feeling ever since Ti came back into her life came rushing into her. Her desire, her attraction to him almost overwhelming that she had trouble breathing. She knew he felt the same way, he had said as much. He was waiting for her to decide that she wanted this too. That she was ready, he would not force her. She appreciated that. And suddenly Andithiel was a far thought from her mind. She knew if she let herself think of him, this would never happen.

Kyli quickly looked around and saw that no one was in the vicinity, and then she continued her walk to him. Her pulse started to quicken as she realized what she was finally going to allow herself to do. Her feet touched the water and she realized that it was warm. Or was that just her that was heating up? Tiandril stayed where he was, he was letting her come to him, making it her decision alone this time. She found him for once. The tables were turned. Once her feet hit the water it was as if she couldn't contain herself anymore. She quickly took her dress off and threw it to the side of the pond and swam to Tiandril. She pulled him roughly to her and kissed him hard and passionately. He didn't hold back either, he had expected this. He returned the kiss with matched passion.

No words were spoken between them, they both knew what they wanted and didn't have to express it in words anymore. All the words had been said. This moment seemed to last forever as their bodies became one. After it was over they both had dressed and lay together in the grass. Kyli had her head on his chest and he was running his fingers through her hair. They were both content, and still had not said anything to each other. Kyli looked up to Ti and he gently kissed her forehead. They had a mutual understanding.

A few months later....

Kyliska was walking to one of the Sunfire Ships that was in a secluded area on the shore of Eversong.She knew that no one would come to this ship, no one had for quite some time. Just to be sure she had made sure that the Sunfire Guards were made aware that she would need to spend some time there to train, by herself. They knew not to question her as a co-scion of the House. She smiled to herself as she walked towards the ship. It was starting to get cloudy and a storm was approaching. She knew she should quicken her step or she would be caught in the rain. For some reason she was content to just walk, she knew what awaited her on the ship and she didn't want to rush anything.

Kyli slowly made her way onto the ship and she went below deck to where the bed chambers were. She saw a sleeping body on the bed and smiled. She then decided to jump on the bed to wake him up.

"Kyli! What are you doing?" Tiandril exclaimed.

"Oh shush Ti!" she said playfully. "I know I woke you up and scared you but really, aren't I a great surprise?" She smiled slyly at him as he pulled her in for a long kiss. Their affair had been ongoing for a few months now. She didn't want to admit it but she felt happy with Tiandril. She also did feel guilty, but when she was with him, that guilt was a far off memory, it was when she was away from him that she let the guilt sink in. Andithiel was still distant. It was as if he knew that she was up to something and was keeping his distance on purpose. No, there is no way he can know Kyli thought. I have been very careful whenever I have met with Tiandril. This ship has been a secret hideout of ours and Andi would never come here, nor would anyone else.

She was also surprised that she was able to keep this from her sister. She would make some broad statements but she had no clue. She would ask if she was staying away from Tiandril, and of course Kyli would lie and say she had not seen him since their fateful kiss. If Biara only knew that they had been sleeping together she would be livid. Kyli shrugged it off. She knew it was wrong to see Tiandril, but that was part of the thrill. She felt as if Andi did not even care for her much anymore or else he would have made more of an effort to see her. He would always let other things take precedence over her. It was different with Ti. He always put her first. He complimented her always, and made her feel special, much like Andi used to make her feel.

Kyli relished in having the undivided attention of a man. She knew it was shallow but she couldn't help herself. A woman liked to be told how beautiful she was! She flopped down on the bed and put her head on Ti's chest. She loved to listen to his heart beat through his sculpted chest. She sighed happily as she listened to the rain pound on the top deck. She had no troubles when she was with him. She forgot about everything else going on in the world, even if it was for a short amount of time. Was this love, or lust? She didn't know. But she would just enjoy it for the time being, even if it didn't last forever. Enjoy the present and deal with the future later.

Jounal Entry July 7, 2013

What is wrong with me? I am in love with Andi. I love him with all of my heart. Yet I cannot stop thinking of Tiandril. It started out so innocent. And then after the other night when we kissed, things have been different. I have been trying not to even see him like my sister had suggested. I have been staying close to home. I do not want to tempt myself. I already feel so guilty about what I did. If Andi were to find out, he would be furious. He cannot find out. I know I must at least find Tiandril just to talk. I need to make him understand that he cannot tell Andi. I know he respects my wishes but he HAS to know not to do that. It would hurt me and Andi and everyone. It is best to try to forget it ever happened. I will try to push my feelings down, and stay with Andi.

I DO love Andi, so this shouldn't be a hard thing to do. But why, why would Tiandril come back into my life? After all of these years. Just to make my life more complicated. Everything was going fine. I just need some time to clear my head. I need to think with my mind instead of my body. It is alright to be attracted to other people, but you do NOT act on it! Biara thinks that Andi will want to marry me and that would be great for both of our Houses. It will unite us. But it is more than a political move. I do love him.

Then why does it sound like I am trying to convince myself of this? Oh I don't know. Is it possible to love two people at the same time? I feel like my heart is torn in two. One minute I am thinking of Andi and then the next Tiandril. Maybe it would be best to not see EITHER of them. I just feel like I finally found love in Andi, and then this happens. Everything was going great. We had been through so much together and we overcame it. My love live has not been simple by any means but it finally WAS. It finally was stable. I had even been drinking less!

Now I find myself either drinking at home or at the bar more. Trying to drown my sorrow and my feelings I suppose. It does help numb the feelings of guilt. I need to find Tiandril and talk to him, just talk. I will sneak out of the Spire. My sister cannot know, and of course Andi cannot know. I will return soon.

The Traitor's Daughter- The End

((Warning: The following RP storyline contains adult content. Several scenes may be difficult for some readers. Reading discretion is advised. All characters involved are here at the request of their owners.)) (Written by Biara)

Kyliska Sunblade's charger made loud thumping noises as she lead the creature down the rather unsturdy looking dock in Ratchet. Considering that much of the coastline was utterly obliterated during the shattering, the Blood Knight supposed that having any dock at all was a blessing and much better than having to swim from the ship to the shore.

As she made her way into the town proper, she paused to look at the structures that the goblins and a variety of other races called home. A stiff cool breeze from the sea behind her stirred her golden hair around her face and made her tabard flutter, the black heart on its red field rippling over her thick plate armor.

Armor that barely fit her now.

Kyliska smiled, reaching down to pat her own stomach, just beginning to swell now with the bump of her first child; the child she and Andissiel had made together. A product of their love, her hesitation to be a mother was founded both on the fears that she would one day end up like her own mother, Sassariel, and on the fact that she simply was unable to contain her desire for action and adventure and be practical with her behavior. The Knight smirked, shaking her head and dismissing the thought; it didn't matter what her 'condition' was, adventure was what stirred her blood to life and she was not about to give up on it, even if she had to take smaller and smaller ones.

Adventures like her current trip.

As Kyliska lead her war steed deeper into the town, she began to reflect on why she was here. Several days ago now, an alliance raiding force had struck out at House Dayfire, destroying a small prison spire deep in the heart of Eversong Woods and freeing a prisoner that her sister Biara had taken. Although Kyliska didn't believe her sister's intentions were poor (she never really doubted that the Magistrix had the best of intentions for Quel'Thalas!), she had thought that the choice of location for holding the prisoner could have been better planned. In fact, it might have been better for there to have been no prisoner for the alliance to come and rescue.

Regardless of all of this, the alliance had slaughtered half a company of House guards, many of Biara's apprentices, and set the structure alight. In addition, mysterious attacks on Kyliska's own Blood Knights within the House had continued throughout Quel'Thalas, and no matter how she changed their patrol schedules or destinations during the patrols, the enemy seemed to have eyes upon their forces and would strike anyway, killing many of her men. By all accounts the aggressors were poorly trained humans, and it was high time that someone did something about it.

Someone like Kyliska Sunblade.

It would be her last adventure before her new life kept her confined to the Spire for longer and longer periods of time, and she would make the most of it. She'd tracked the humans back to a pirate ship that had docked in Ratchet several days ago, and she was about to find out both where they had gone from there, as well as whether or not they had any relation to the recent raids on her sister's holdings. It would be an excellent opportunity to swing her blade a few more times before setting it aside for decades.

***********************

A black shadow slipped through the night, almost undetectable as it blended into the natural darkness around it. It moved with a will of it's own, slipping through the underbrush of the Northern Barrens with an uncanny sense of direction. After a time, the construct came upon a small clearing hidden deep within the vast plains. A tent sat within the space, bordered by the large trees that dominated some parts of the otherwise flat landscape.

As it approached the tent, it slowed down, walking now rather than gliding, it's form looking much like a Sin'dorei as it moved. The flaps of the tent before it opened, and an actual Sin'dorei stepped out. Although the construct was composed of blackest darkness, and the elf was a contrasting marble-like white, the two were otherwise identical in appearance.

The construct bowed before the elf and then began to whisper about what it had seen in the nearby town of Ratchet, news that was long awaited.

Seluna Dawnsea grinned wickedly as she took the information in and then dismissed her shadowy apparition. She gestured and a small magical hum was heard throughout the clearing. Within the brush was the sound of stirring figures as the humans she'd enslaved began to rise. Her so-called Cult of the Shadowed Eye had spent much time preparing for what was to come, and finally all of the work was about to pay off.

For the first time in a long time, Seluna began to hurry in her preparations, eager to begin.

**************************

Kyliska paused, peering through the trees around her, trying to feel with her combat senses what might be ahead. She had traveled for several days to reach this spot, all the while planning what she would do and how she would investigate the issue at hand. The news she'd received from goblins in Ratchet and later from Tauren in the Crossroads had lead her to this spot deep in the heart of Ashenvale. All accounts had pointed to the human group abandoning the area around Ratchet and proceeding in this direction, likely to cause more mischief to the Horde.

Although Kyliska had been disappointed to discover that her enemies were fleeing, she was still determined to track them down; no one entered Quel'Thalas and killed her men without retribution! It was in her blood now, and she would not be denied even if it took a few weeks to track the humans down. She shook her head and frowned; if she took too much longer Andissiel would come to find her and she didn't want her beloved to interfere with the bit of fun she was likely to have!

Ahead of her in the trees Kyliska saw her goal; a sharply inclined face of rock with a crevasse through the front. She'd been tracking the humans for days in the forest now, and a chance encounter with an old orc hunter had lead her towards this spot. From what she could gather through the scant information she was able to collect so far, the humans had set up a camp within the crevasse and were using it as a base to launch more raids on the Horde forces within the forest. They were a ragtag bunch, dressed in black robes and fanatical in their assaults.

Precisely the kind of humans Kyliska was most fond of cutting to shreds with her sword.

She grinned wickedly, her grip on the familiar blade strong as she made her way stealthily through the underbrush towards the narrow gap ahead. She would find the cultists and slaughter them by surprise and be back at Dayfire Spire before the sun set this day.

*******************

The first human was unaware that he was under attack until the holy Light had slammed into him, exorcising him to ash in a brilliant flash of energy. The two humans closest to him were equally unprepared for the stroke of the two-handed sword that cleaved one's head clean off and slashed a fatal gouge down the front of the other's chest in its downward swing.

Ten in all, now seven, the humans were a rag-tag bunch of cultists in black robes with a strange eye symbol over their hearts. They had been fortunate in their attacks in Eversong, using stealth and surprise to launch ambushed, but in a stand-up fight they were poorly trained and completely unprepared for the armored death that launched itself into their midst.

Kyliska's plate armored body slammed into the next two who rushed her, physically throwing them over the back of the granite slab they had been using for an altar. Her hand lashed out, the plate gauntlet crushing the windpipe of a human that dashed in behind her, even as she whirled and cut the legs from a man in front of her. Her victim fell screaming showering Kyliska with his lifeblood as he died.

Kyliska Sunblade laughed.

Oh how she loved the thrill of battle! She dove around the awkward thrust of one of the humans, disemboweling him with her own weapon and then hurling his bloodied form towards a woman that screamed and ran at her, entangling the foe. Her blade rose and then fell, ending the struggling woman's life as she tried to free herself from her own dead companion.

Humans were such fools, but at least they bled brightly before they died!

The two men she had thrown over the altar rose behind it, looking at her with fear but also a bit of fanaticism in her eyes. She gave them no chance to go on the offensive, leaping onto the granite platform and lashing out with one of her plate boots, catching the first man in the face and shattering it. The second man raised his blade, a small dagger, and Kyliska giggled as she carved his arm from his body, her lithe form drenched with the blood of her enemies, her heart beating rapidly in her chest and breaths coming out in gasps as the battle lust infused her. The combat had lasted seconds, but already the clearing was empty of foes.

Or so she thought.

Seconds later a cry arose from the rocks around her, and dozens of humans charged into the small space where the altar had been prepared, wicked daggers raised high. Kyliska's eyes widened as she realized that the first ten had been intentionally sacrificed. The real battle had not even begun.

Her eyes narrowing, Kyliska grabbed her sword with both hands, setting herself upon the granite and preparing to deal death to the fools.

****************************

The cultists were like the waves crashing against a rocky coast. They slammed into the edge of the altar, and there were repelled by a force far greater than they were. Men and women fell screaming, their lifeblood pumping into the fertile soil of Ashenvale as they tried to take down a Sin'dorei who had better training, armor, and strategic positioning than they did.

Even so, eventually the tide overcomes the shore, and Kyliska found herself more and more having to dodge blows that came close to crippling her, or kicking out at humans who had climbed onto the altar with her. The men and women seemed unlike enemies she had fought before; their eyes were glassy with fanatical zeal, and they shouted obscenities to whatever god they worshiped as they charged her again and again. Ordinary foes would have been horrified by the carnage around them, would have long ago faltered as they realized the price they were paying to take down a single foe. But these were not ordinary enemies; they were not even in control of their own actions as they fell before her.

Slowly the blood knight found herself having to strike out around her in all directions as the slab of stone was surrounded. Here and there she had taken a hit against her heavy armor, and dents and scratches showed. In a spot beneath her right arm blood flowed down her side from where the tip of a dagger had nicked her flesh. They were minor wounds, but she was tiring and knew she had to break free before it was too late.

The enemy gave her no time.

In a move that was utterly suicidal, one of the cultists threw himself on her blade, lodging it deep within his bowels. He purposely squirmed along the cruel steel, entangling her weapon and forcing her to waste precious time trying to free it. Even as the man died and she cut her weapon free, eight more jumped up onto the granite altar, throwing themselves at her and tackling her.

Kyliska Sunblade was not about to let an inconvenience like being outnumbered and pinned down stop her from killing. Her body spasmed, fists, feet, and Light slashing out around her. Three more men were killed or permanently maimed before enough of the cultists had climbed atop her to wrest her sword from her hand and pin her thrashing limbs down. About twelve of the humans still lived when it was over, where before there had easily been thirty. They had paid a deadly price to subdue her.

As Kyliska's heart raced, one of the humans who had remained somewhat aloof from the fighting stepped forward, a wicked dagger in his hand. His eyes saw nothing, the fanatical look in them seeing only something in the distance that he himself heard, and he muttered to himself about the Shadowed Eye watching them. The Blood Knight tried to squirm under the men who held her, but was unable to free herself as the human came closer.

He gestured to the remaining cultists, and they brought their blades up, cutting away the straps of her breastplate and flinging it into the dirt beside the altar. The man climbed up, standing over her and holding his dagger high. It did not take much mental power to understand that Kyliska was about to be sacrificed then and there.

She snarled at the humans, “Do your worst then, for if I am able to free myself none of you will walk away alive! I swear to the Light I will carve each of you to shreds!”

The man stopped chanting and looked at her, a smile on his face. “The Shadowed Eye cares little for you elf. You mean nothing to him!”

Kyliska blinked at him in confusion for a moment. “B-but...why are you sacrificing me then? I don't understand...”

The man's smile only widened as he raised the dagger up, spoke three last words of magic, and brought it down hard. It glittered in the light of the day as it descended, and Kyliska found herself bemused by the thought that this weapon, this strike would finally be the one that ended her life. The blade arced down quickly, and she braced herself to die as it plunged.

Right into her belly, into her womb.

Her screams echoed from the rocks around her as understanding of the man's words hit home. The dagger flared, the magic within it sucking life energy out, destroying everything it touched, everything inside her, the life she had come to grudgingly accept responsibility for. In that moment her hopes and dreams for the future were shattered, even as her body was shattered and bled. She wanted to die, she wanted the man to bring the blade up and gut her, finishing his work, but her suffering went on endlessly.

***********************************

Seluna Dawnsea shivered with delight as the Blood Knight's screams echoed around her. It was a sound she had waited over a hundred years to hear; the sound of a traitor's daughter getting the justice she deserved. The moment stretched on, Kyliska's suffering unbelievably sweet to the priestess' ears as she stood there watching from the shadows.

After she had let the blade do its work for long enough, Seluna stepped forward, her lithe form making almost no sound as she let inky black tendrils of shadow ooze from her skin, hovering in the air around her. The cultists looked up, bowing their heads as they saw their mistress approaching, knowing they had pleased her.

That is why four of them died almost instantly as Seluna's magic lashed out against them.

They screamed of course. They always screamed when she killed them. It was almost a bothersome sound as her shadows lashed across the small space, throwing panicked men and women to the ground and leaving them to bleed out. She almost laughed once when one of them charged at her, his knife raised over his head in desperation. Her shadows actually cut his body in half before he came anywhere near her.

The final cultist, the 'leader' she had installed in place, still stood over Kyliska, his dagger protruding from her belly as she stared at Seluna in shock.

“B-but I d-don't...don't understand...” he stuttered.

“Hush now,” Seluna replied in a husky whisper. A tendril of shadow lashed out, smashing the human in the face and knocking him back off the altar. The clearing fell silent as Seluna surveyed the devastation.

It was over. The cultists were all dead, and Kyliska lay mortally wounded on the altar, her child stolen from her womb with deadly magic. Exactly as Seluna had planned all along. Perfect in all but one detail; Kyliska had not suffered enough yet.

The priestess let the shadows fade from her, her form shimmering and returning to the pale looking elf that she was. Her eyes glowed with a blue light as she fixed a few pieces of stray hair back into place and casually walked over to Kyliska. She cleared her throat, as if practicing, her face taking on a false look of concern.

“Kyliska! Kyliska Sunblade, can you hear me?” She put just the right amount of desperation in her voice as she leaned over the fallen Blood Knight.

Kyliska groaned and looked at her, pain and despair in her eyes so delicious to Seluna that her mask almost slipped. “S-seluna...w-what....they took...they took...” tears rolled down the knight's face as she cried bitterly, the weapon still stuck in her belly. The emotional pain of loss was worse than the actual wound, although it would be fatal in time.

Seluna gently ran a hand through Kyliska's hair, keeping her feelings of delight under tight control. “Hush now, don't try to speak. I will try and save you and get you to safety. I've managed to dispatch the cultists for now. Please Kyliska, just hold on a little longer....”

Kyliska's eyes closed, her choked sobs softening as the pain and devastating loss overwhelmed her. She passed into unconsciousness and left Seluna standing over her, grinning vilely.

“Yes, let me save you so that you can remember for the rest of your miserable life what it means to have the blood of a traitorous bitch in you. Let your memories haunt you and ride you, showing you how much of a failure you are to your homeland,” she hissed at the unconscious elf. “We can't let you die though, oh no, you've not had nearly enough time to suffer from this.”

Seluna began to sing, her prayer a beautiful, haunting melody that filled the clearing around her. Light built in her hand, and the priestess winced as it burned her flesh; it was always painful for her to handle the Light given her unnatural state, and this time it was doubly painful as the spell she was using was exceptionally powerful. With her free hand she yanked the blade from Kyliska's flesh, letting the life-stealing weapon fall to the ground. She reached out with her glowing hand, pressing it against Kyliska's wounds.

Nothing happened.

Seluna's eyes widened in shock and rage. Her singing faltered as whispers rose around her in the clearing; whispers she knew quite well.

“No Selun'athiel, my beloved. You cannot use the Light for such an end. She will pass on now, and rest in peace,” Tel'athar's voice seemed to come from all around her.

Seluna's rage was unmatched. She shook with it. Her fists came down and pounded on Kyliska's still form as she shrieked at the whispering air around her. The dead; her many victims from long ago, grew louder, more insistent with each pounding blow on the body of her victim. The dead, still body.

“I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!” she yelled at nothing at all. Within her mind though, she knew the spirit of Tel'athar could hear her, would know the course she planned.

He whispered to her again, his voice otherworldly, “There is one way and one way alone that this will be allowed. The Knight's life will still have purpose, even after this. But you....you must come to understand what it is you have done. There is a price to be paid.”

Seluna's eyes narrowed and her voice came out in a deadly whisper. “I will have my revenge.”

She got no response, but the whispers died away to nothing, the feeling of their presence leaving her. She breathed a sigh of relief, preparing to cast her spell again when the pain hit her. She cried out, bending over in agony as it felt like hot knives were ripping through her again and again. Her mind felt the heavy weight of despair close in upon it, a desire to simply close her eyes and let it all go filling her. She felt every second of Kyliska's agony, her pain and despair over the loss of her child, the mental anguish she had inflicted on the Blood Knight, pain that wasn't hers.

Seluna staggered, leaning heavily against the altar, her breath coming in gasps. Her knuckles turned white as she gripped the stone and shook with the pain, wanting it to end and knowing it was the price she had to pay to use the Light in a manner that would inflict harm on another living thing. It was the price of being what she was, what her daughter and the bitch lying dead on the stone before her had allowed her to become.

Seluna's head snapped up, her face a mask of determination. An iron will that had kept her going for over two centuries, that had lead her through her own death and acceptance of her return in her unpure form burned within her. Her eyes blazed with the blue of the Quel'dorei, her spirit manifest in that moment more than it had ever been before. She reached out, laying a shaking hand on Kyliska's still form, her course set.

“So be it. I will have my revenge,” she said. She began to sing then. Each note held perfectly, each sound coming unerringly from the throat of an elf in the most extreme agonies, both mental and physical. Her desire, her desperate need to make Kyliska pay for the sins of her mother driving the song onward, forcing the Light to come to her call, to heal and restore the victim of her urges.

It came forth. It was begrudging, and the pain grew worse before the end, but the Light answered her call, falling down upon Kyliska in a cone of radiance that made Seluna's skin sizzle where it struck her. As the song ended, she withdrew her partially burned hand and waited, her prayers answered a moment later when Kyliska's chest heaved and breath came to her once again, her wounds slowly closing upon themselves.

As Kyliska's pain ended, so too did Seluna's, and she shivered with relief as the spell healed the burning agony she felt inside, the agony that Kyliska had felt. The priestess grinned, calling upon the shadows to aide her as she stood upright, wrapping the now-unconscious elf's body within her spells, lifting it and carrying it from that place.

It was time for Kyliska to go home, and think about the consequences of what it meant to be a lying half-breed bitch birthed by a traitor to Quel'Thalas.

***************************

Seluna smiled as she stepped from the tent, high on the peaks of Thunderbluff. She had left Kyliska behind in the small structure there, sleeping fitfully beneath the skins. The tent belonged to Elunearia Moonblade, and the surprise that would await her when she returned was as delicious to Seluna as what she had done to Kyliska.

Let them all suffer together. Let them know the foolishness of their actions. They were all failures, and every single one of them would pay before the end.

She stood there for a moment, letting the winds of Mulgore wash over her. She was Selun'athiel Dayfire, Sorceress of Quel'Thalas, Mother of Biara Dayfire, beloved wife of Tel'athar Dayfire.

Scion and true ruler of House Dayfire. It was time for everyone to know this once and for all.

The Traitor's Daughter- Part 3

(This was written by Biara)


One of the chargers neighed nervously as the Blood Knight pulled at her reigns. The forest of Eversong surrounded the small mounted party, and each of the four Blood Knights looked at each other as their leader turned his steed in the path. It was a quiet morning, and the four had been riding for about an hour and a half, performing a patrol of the forest as Lady Dayfire had bid them to do on a routine basis. They were just a small part of Biara Dayfire's personal military forces within Silvermoon, and House Dayfire dedicated a good portion of these forces in ensuring the safety of Quel'Thalas.

The problem was, it was TOO quiet. One of the horses shifted uncomfortably again, as if sensing something wasn't quite right. Each of the Blood Knights became tense as the silence of the forest lengthened. There were no birds, no animals; only the sound of the wind flowing through the leaves of the trees above. Far too quiet.

The Blood Knight in the lead opened his mouth to order the others to dismount and draw their blades, but his command came too late. A thrown rock slammed into his helmet, the force of the blow knocking him from the saddle into the dirt of the trail. From the brush all around the party a roar of battleshouts could be heard, the words spoken in Common and unintelligible to the Blood Knights. Two of them drew their blades, even as another was struck with a projectile and knocked from his saddle.

As the Blood Knights took stock of the situation, they saw to their horror that dozens of human sized figures in dark robes were pouring from the woods around them, completely surrounding them. Their blades flashed as they brought them down again and again, and several of the attacking cultists drew back with cries of pain as they were wounded. It was no avail though; the two mounted knights were quickly swarmed, and their horses were stabbed repeatedly, the tendons in their legs cut until they fell, bringing their champions down with them.

Once on the ground, the Blood Knights stood little chance against the numbers brought against them. The tiny patrol was quickly swarmed, pelted with rocks and stabbed with wicked looking ritual blades. Many of the weapons used against them were magically altered and cursed, and the knights bled and died as the cultists achieved victory with their ambush.

When it was over, the four Blood Knights lay strewn across the path, their once noble mounts joining them in death as the cultists finished their work. A slender figure emerged from the edge of the forest onto the trail, her form garbed in the same ceremonial robes and her head cowled. She paused to look on the scene, her expression hidden in the darkness of the garments she wore.

Seluna was pleased. Her cultists had achieved total surprise in the ambush, and it was not the first they'd managed to pull off in the past two days. Several patrols of House Dayfire Blood Knights had been taken in such a fashion, and the attacks and losses would not go unnoticed much longer. She grinned fiercely, bringing a manicured hand up and pointing.

"Their Light! Steal it for the Shadowed Eye that our Lord will come to us in darkness," she said, putting just enough religious zeal in her tone make the cultists jump to obey.

She watched as they took out specially prepared daggers, shadowy magic flaring on the flats of the blades. Four of her cultists positioned themselves over the bodies of the Blood Knights, plunging the artifacts into their corpses. Immediately magic flared in the clearing as the Light contained within the Blood Knights was drained into the weapons, the spirits of the dead joining them in captivity. A hollow wailing sound could be heard as the veil between life and death was penetrated for a moment.

Seluna smiled as the magic died down. She had spent many days preparing the weapons using a mixture of her own shadowy magic and scourge spells that she had learned. Such magic came naturally to her now, and she put it to good use. The Light that the Blood knights carried within them was just another source of magic to her; something to be collected and used, or in this case collected and stolen to add to the affront of butchery already committed. There was only one detail remaining, and Seluna frowned as she surveyed the scene.

There were no clues as to who had committed the ambush.

The priestess pointed at one of the cultists around her. "You. The shadows call to you. Our master has seen fit to reward you with the ultimate gift; your life will add to the portal used to summon His essence to this world."

The selected cultist beamed with delight as she pointed at him, falling to his knees. "Yes mistress! I am Chosen!"

Seluna nodded and purred at the man, "You know what to do."

The human plunged a dagger into his own heart, falling to the ground and bleeding out his life in great gouts of gore. Seluna watched impassively as his feeble convulsions died down with time. The man left a huge puddle of his own lifeblood on the trail, the dirt soaking it up hungrily. It was evidence that a properly trained Blood Knight or other tracker would be able to use to determine that humans had been involved in the fighting. Exactly what Seluna wanted, and precisely the same as all of the other ambushes her forces had commited so far.

She smiled and turned away, snapping her fingers. Behind her, the cultists gathered up the body of their comrade, leaving the gore and a fallen dagger behind along with the bodies of their victims. Another successful assault.

*******************

Off the coast of Quel'Thalas, a human wargalley raised its sails, allowing the wind to propel it through the water. The banners flying over it were black, with skulls and other symbols of death depicted clearly on the sails. Any who observed the ship would know that pirates crewed it, and from the markings on the ship and its sails, they were clearly Bloodsail Pirates. Witnesses would easily be able to recount the style of the vessel if they happened to be along the coast.

Seluna made sure that her hired ship set sail in the middle of the day, close enough to the coast for those observing eyes to make it out.

When questioned and offered the right incentive in gold, the Bloodsails would surely have loose tongues concerning the group of crazed human cultists that had hired them to travel along the coast of Quel'Thalas. A clear trail for those that cared to follow it. Deep within her cabin aboard the ship, Seluna smiled. Soothing shadows bathed her, surrounding her in darkness that matched the inky blackness in her heart.

Everything was going as planned, and soon House Dayfire would know they had been assaulted and their magic had been stolen. The bait was set, and soon she would taste a small measure of the vengeance she craved.

Soon justice will be done. Soon I will finally see a small measure of satisfaction for all of the many disappointments that I've awoken to. Soon I will not suffer alone.

The thoughts comforted Seluna as the ship sailed off into the deep waters of the ocean, heading towards Booty Bay.

The Traitor's Daughter- Part 2

(This was written by Biara)

The setting sun cast a warm glow over the fields of wheat, giving the land a golden hue for miles around. Lying on the border of Westfall and Duskwood, the farm stretched for several miles, the entirety of the place looking like a glimmering pile of treasure in the lgiht. Seluna paused on a small hill overlooking the fields, her eyes counting the farmhands and helpers working or idly chatting as their day drew to a close. Her count ended at over a dozen of the humans, and she nodded to herself, as if confirming something she had already figured on.

Slowly, she made her way down the small hill, taking care not to allow her movements to be picked out against the backdrop of the terrain behind her. She wanted to move closer without being observed for a time. As she reached the edge of the fields, she paused and looked upon a scarecrow standing nearby to ward away birds and other things that might make their way into the field and destroy the crops. She smirked and took a step on the borders of the field.

Power slammed into her and made her tremble with agony. She quickly reeled back, her feet taking her away from the edge of the ripe wheat and immediately the pain dimmed. Seluna almost laughed aloud as she looked at the scarecrow with new respect; apparently a wandering priest had blessed it to prevent OTHER pests from entering the fields, pests such as the undead that lurked in the nearby forests of Duskwood. The holy energy in the little straw figure was enough to repel her, and she was forced to walk the long way around the field. Her amusement waned with the wasted time and effort it took to walk so far,and by the time she'd reached a small path between the fields, shadows played on her skin and in the air around her. Her smile had become an expressionless mask as she set about the task she was to perform.

**************

John Lightforge had worked on the farm for most of his adult life, and in that time he'd seen many creatures both fair and foul roam across the fields. Usually things crept from Duskwood, and had to be hunted lest they hunt the men at night, so he was vigillant when outdoors to keep an eye on his surroundings. Even so, despite all his experience, the last thing he expected to see stepping from between the rows of wheat was a dark haired, pale skinned Quel'dorei elf. Her eyes glowed blue and there was an almost alluring beauty about her as deep violet shadows played over her body and twisted in achingly beautiful paterns in the air about her.

Her gaze locked with his, and he could feel her presence as if she were standing beside him whispering in his ear. He longed to hear her voice and the shadows playfully slid through the air, surrounding him.

As Seluna's power took his mind, he mentally screamed, but no sound was heard other than that of the farmhand sinking to his knees. After she had concentrated for a few moments, reaming his mind of free will, he rose silently. "What do you require mistress?"

Seluna smirked, stepping past him and beckoning for him to follow. There were many more farmhands amongst the humans on the farm.

*****************

Mary Lightforge looked up as the door to the house opened and she heard footsteps in the adjoining room. It was odd for any of the farmhands to come in before the dinnerbell, and it sounded like the entire lot of them had arrived early! The stew wasn't even fully cooked yet, and it would be another half hour at least before she rang for them. She wiped her hands on her apron and stepped away from the cauldron that contained her stew, turning towards the door and stopping with a gasp.

There in the doorway stood what looked to be a Quel'dorei elf. Behind her, all of the farmhands from the fields stood, their eyes blank and vacant. The elf smirked at her and her knees buckled as shadowy magic assaulted her mind. After  a few moments of pressure, she knew no more.

**********************

Seluna smiled to herself as the farmwife fell to her power. She was the last of the adults on the farm, and the priestess had collected over a dozen human followers with her powers. They were easily subdued to her eyes, weak and inferior to her own race in every way.

Perfect for her plans.

As the woman rose, she snapped her fingers and one of the farmhands brought forth a pack she had made him carry. Seluna smiled, reaching in and pulling out black garments, tossing them to the enthralled humans.

"You are now members of the Cult of the Shadowed Eye," she purred. "You should feel honored, for your god has called to you personally, and you will herald the coming of his divine form on this world."

The humans-turned-cultists all broke into grins and bowed their heads before donning the ceremonial garb Seluna had brought. Everything she'd said was a farce of course, but that too was part of the plan. Everything was coming together perfectly. Her long ears detected a sound in the next room and she frowned in irritation. There were children playing.

"The young are too little to be initiated in the cult, and not favored by the Eye," she said softly. "Eliminate them."

Several of the humans picked up knives from the nearby counters, their minds so damaged by her spells that they didn't think to question. The female paused though, trembling and fighting Seluna's spell. She pouted in irritation. "You will do as you are told. Eliminate them now."

The woman continue to shake, defying her. Seluna's eyes blazed blue as her anger grew. Her magic lashed out.

******************************

In the end, the young and even the female had to be killed in order to get the others to obey her. Seluna shrugged and walked from the fields, the humans she had taken walking behind her silently. The farmhouse looked like the scene of a demonic ritual gone bad, with blood sacrifices and ritualistic markings adorning the floors and walls. It would take the humans of Westfall weeks to determine what had happened, and it was hardly a concern of hers anyway what conclusions they came to.

Seluna smiled as the humans carried her things for her, leading them towards their future. A future spent giving their lives to her designs. She laughed aloud as the darkness of Duskwood folded around her and her thralls.

The Traitor's Daughter- Part 1

(This was written by Biara)

The sun shone brightly in the warm spring air, reflecting brightly from the wares of a fine jewelry vendor in the Bazaar of Silvermoon City. Seluna paused, admiring the sparkle of light coming from the expensive pieces, the diamonds in them drawing her gaze. After she'd paused to eye over the items, she decided that she'd have to come back later to do some additional shopping, she had another task in mind.

Moving past the jeweler's cart, she headed towards the clothier in this part of the Bazaar. House Dawnsea had run into some good fortune thanks to the leadership of Kenzie Dawnsea, and the Dawnsea Manor was being renovated and expanded upon. Seluna wanted to ensure that new wall hangings and drapes were purchased that were pleasing to her tastes, since she would be moving into more lavish quarters within the Manor. She paused before a cart filled with bolts of the finest cloth, picking up the trailing edge of a piece of deep purple embersilk, admiring the quality of the piece.

As she examined the fabric, she happened to glance up, her eyes taking in the passersby as the Bazaar filled with the morning's customers. Many Sin'dorei walked through this part of the city, citizens, guards, and merchants all mingling in the open space, enjoying the morning's sun as they went about their lives. She cared little for any of them, and watched as they continued with their insignificant existences, her eyes barely focusing on any one of them for more than a moment; until she saw a pair walking nearby, hand in hand.

Seluna's eyes widened and her knuckles turned white against the fabric she held as her anger burned hot within her. There, walking through the Bazaar and holding hands with her lover, was Kyliska Sunblade. The Sin'dorei had replaced her armor with a light flowing red dress, and her hair was carefully styled in latest fashions the nobility wore. Her slender hand was held by a handsome looking huntsman with flowing blonde hair, presumably the Sin'dorei named Andissiel Moonblade that Seluna had heard rumor of. She'd heard many other rumors concerning the elf as well.

The sight of the two elves as they paused to exchange a sweet kiss drove Seluna's rage to new heights. She remembered well the traitor's daughter. The Sin'dorei known as Kyliska Sunblade had always been a point of irritation for Seluna. Like her mother before her, it seemed now that Kyliska was destined to betray her people, destined to be with those of Kaldorei blood, destined to continue the legacy of shame that her mother brought to the people of Quel'Thalas.

Her eyes flashed ice blue and she trembled as the force of memory took her, her mind reeling.

******************************

Over one hundred years in the past, a Quel'dorei elf stood holding a pearl handled comb in one hand. She smiled at the reflection in the mirror before her as she looked over the young elf that sat in the chair in front of the mirror. The elf was but a child, her thirteen years of age but a small speck of time compared to the lifetime of a Quel'dorei, and yet she looked so grown up and noble in her fine dress and expensive jewelry.

Selun'athiel's smile deepened as she took her daughter Biar'athiel's hair in her hand, the fine red strands gliding between the teeth of the comb so like her mother's darker red coloring. She stroked her daughter's hair, arranging it as the young girl shifted in her seat, peering at herself in the mirror.

"Mother, do I HAVE to go?" Biar'athiel whined. "I don't want to go to this ball. I don't want to wear this dress; it's SO uncomfortable!"

Selun'athiel shushed her gently as she continued to comb the other's hair, "Yes, you HAVE to go. All of the other Houses are sending their children, and it wouldn't look right if House Dayfire didn't send their own daughter. Besides, what would your father think if he knew you were disobeying his wishes?"

Biar'athiel fidgeted but offered no further complaint as she watched her mother work. Selun'athiel was right of course; Tel'athar would want her to go just for appearances. All of the Houses sent their young children to such events, in part to let them mingle with others of the same lineage, and also to glean secrets from each other. It was part of a game that the nobles played, and their children were pieces on the gameboard at times.

"Besides," Selun'athiel purred, "You might make a few friends there. I want you to pay particular attention to keep an eye out for a young elf named Kyliska Sunblade. The girl is close to your age, and I believe you two will get along splendidly. You can't spend all of your time cooped up within our Spire studying, and making friends like this Kyliska will help you to expand your own social circle. You want to be grown up and powerful like your mother some day, don't you dearest?"

Biar'athiel looked at herself in the mirror with a somewhat sullen expression as her hair was arranged in the latest style of the courts. "Yes mother..."

Selun'athiel nodded as she put the last of Biar'athiel's hair in place; her daughter would be useful in gaining information about Kyliska's mother Sassariel Sunblade. She had known for years now that Sassariel had a dalliance with a Kaldorei her spies and scrying spells having revealed much of what Sassariel had been up to. With Biar'athiel frequenting Sunblade Spire, Selun'athiel knew that she would gain enough evidence one day to have Sassariel punished for her crimes, and House Dayfire would gain much influence in the city, not to mention some of House Sunblades merchant enterprises and wealth. The plan was flawless, and Selun'athiel's daughter was the perfect pawn to set events in motion.

She finished up her work with her daughters hair, and met Biar'athiel's gaze in the mirror, ice blue eyes meeting sea green eyes with a smile. "There, that wasn't so bad was it? Now off you go to the ball! Have a good time, and remember what I said about Kyliska Sunblade."

Biar'athiel nodded happily at her mother, gave her a quick kiss, and scurried from the room, heading for the carriage that would take her to the grand ball. She would meet Kyliska Sunblade that night, the two thirteen year olds hitting it off, becoming fast friends.

Becoming sisters in heart for the rest of their lives.

********************************************

Seluna shook with rage. All those years ago, she had set her daughter on the path of friendship with Kyliska. The little nobody had even had the gall to call her daughter by the nickname Biara, and her foolish offspring had happily taken up this name when she'd gained control of House Dayfire. Sassariel had, in a way, won a blow against Seluna in her daughter, and it was not to be tolerated.

The cloth dropped from Seluna's shaking hands, settling back on the pile before her, unnoticed as her cold gaze watched the pair of elves move off through the bazaar. For an agonizing minute, Seluna was not sure if she'd be able to control her anger, the NEED for revenge burning through her. The need to strike Kyliska dead almost overwhelming.

She shook her head. No. Death is too good for you Kyliska. You deserve so much more pain.

Her senses reached out, sensing the pair as they went out of her sight. Sensing the life energy in the two, no three as they headed off.

Three. THREE LIVES.

Kyliska Sunblade was pregnant.

Seluna looked down, watching in alarm as shadows slithered out of the flesh of her hand. She buried it under the cloth in the cart, pretending to look at the material, struggling not to release the pent up rage within her.

The little slut managed to get herself with child, and with a Kaldorei no less. Just like her mother, she is a traitor to Quel'Thalas, and my daughter betrays our lands just by sheltering the lowblood. She's not even properly married to another noble!

Seluna brought her rage under control, the shadows dispersing and her eyes fading to fel green once more. So be it. I see now what my duty must be. Kyliska Sunblade must suffer the same agony that I suffer every day when I look at our beautiful homeland and what's become of it. She must come to know what it means to have the future ruined, and her lover must pay the ultimate price.

Kyliska Sunblade must pay.

Seluna removed her hands from the cloth before her, walking away slowly as she headed back towards Dawnsea Manor. She had much thinking to do.

Shadows of the Past

(This was written by Andithiel)

He felt that he was a stranger within the forest. The golden sunlight broke through the trees and reflected on the very leaves, enchancing the golden glow of Eversong Forest, leaving no room for shadows. The sunlight bore down on him, as if it too were watching him. He wanted to be alone.

Andissiel's eyes began to scout the surrounding area. It had only been a few times with Kyliska that he was able to venture into the forest...but those times, his eyes were soley fixed on the woman whom he loves. Nothing else around him mattered. Without her, everything felt foreign to him, Silvermoon, Eversong, his very existance. He knew no where else to retreat to but here. His sisters he could not turn to as each one was re-discovering thei own paths with the fall of House Dayfire.

His paced slowed as the sounds of battle were heard not far off in the distance. After a few steps, a few Sin'Dorei warriors were seen. Each one was stationed at a practice dummy, using them for obvious purposes. This was no battle...it was a training excercise for these men. Andissiel watched, trying to get an idea of who these men represented, each one bore a tabard of a House in which he did not recognize...quickly he began to lose interest.

He turned around and took a few steps away until the name "Kyliska" was mentioned. Andissiel froze. His eyes widened...and his heart stopped, he quickly turned back and took refuge behind a large tree as he began to listen to the two warrior's conversation. The two made sneer remarks to one another regarding each other's tactics before mentioning Kyliska once more. The two spoke of seeing her within Silvermoon only hours before training to enter a tournament being held at Gurubashi Arena.

Andissiel turned the opposite direction and ran towards Silvermoon in way of Stranglethorn. If Kyliska was well and recently learned of the disaster regarding her sister Biara...and her House, he knew she would endanger herself over the grief, sadness and sorrow she was dealt with. It was all too much for him, let alone for Kyliska who had been in a coma for months.

Silvermoon City and the Flightmaster came into view shortly after.

A sense of betrayal

(This was written by Selenthiel)

Selenthiel fiddled with her hair as she sat on the edge of her bed, the golden threads in her lavish bed sheets caught the sun as it entered the room from the eastern side of the room. It was in there mere hours of the early morning and House Felo'melorn's servents were already preparing for an important guest. Selenthiel signed, taking in the last moments of here serene morning. In her right hand , she held a opened letter addressed to her from her sister Ty'avel. She raised the letter and once again quickly skimmed over the importance of what it said ;

"My dearest sister,

As you open this letter, I have no doubt that suspicions race through your mind with what motives I may have as to why I would temporary set aside my powers as Magistrix of the House.  For whatever reason or purpose you believe, I must assure you that I have the best of interest for the House, for Quel'thalas and more importantly, for the Horde. For this very reason, my stay within Pandaria has been extended longer then I had anticipated and never before has my presence been so important, it was then I knew I must appoint a successor to our House should I not return.
For reasons already known to you, appointing you was the only way to ensure House Felo'melorn would continue on without the threat of being absorbed by the other Houses, politically or forcefully.  As you will come to find out soon enough, being a leader is more then just being cunning or tactful, influence and power will also come into play. Therefore, in my absence, you must maintain House Felo'melorn's alliegiance to the Blackhearts Alliance. My work here, along with Denissia at my side, will prove to be valuable to Garrosh and the goals he has set in motion. If our work is a success, we will no longer have to worry about the other House's ever....again.

Your loving sister,Ty'avel
"
Selenthiel's hand tightened around the letter, immediately causing the letter to burst into flames as she focused her holy power . Releasing her grasp of what remained of the letter fell to the floor, she arose from her bed and prepared to head to the main entry hall of the spire. "And so you shall have a true leader dear sister...", Selenthiel said softly to herself as she opened her door leading to the hallway. Closing the door behind her, two House guards offered a gentle nod in her presence. "Guardsman,  I need one of you to deliver a simple message to House Sunfire and House Dawnsea. Tell them, effective immediately House Felo'melorn withdraws it participation within the Blackhearts Alliance.  Also, get a courier over to House Sunhaven requesting an audience with Lady Alleriel...I have new alliances that must be negotiated..."

Selenthiel slowly turned in direction toward the main entry hall as a devious grin formed upon her face.

Tiandril's Journal Entry May 14, 2013

I was told to write in a journal. It would help me work through some things that I had on my mind. I'm not sure if this will help much but I figured why not at least give it a try. My name is Tiandril Sunsilk, and some of my friends just call me Ti. My younger sister Kastarya is training to be a Warlock. This is partly because of me I'm afraid. I know that Blood Elves are supposed to live for a very long time, but I'm different. I was cursed. No, not cursed like a worgen as one might think, but cursed none the less. Kast had heard that Warlocks can use curses to their advantage so we were hoping that in her studies she might be able to find out what curse was put on me and how we could fix it.

It seems like so long ago that this even happened. Time is pretty foggy in my brain, that might be due to this curse. I was training to be a Blood Knight when we were doing an exercise against some scourge. I think that is when it happened, but I can't be sure. I do remember seeing this beautiful Blood Knight in training also. She had this long flowing blonde hair and was so graceful as she fought. She got so focused, I was a little jealous. I never could concentrate as hard as she could on her fighting. She made it look effortless. And all the while I was mesmerized by her.

Sadly I did not have much contact with her. We had talked briefly but nothing more. After the curse was put onto me, I lost some of my physical abilities. I was not able to train to be a Blood Knight anymore, this was my choice. I never gave a good reason why, I just quit. I felt useless. My brain was always foggy, it was hard to remember people's names, and places I had been. There were two names that I could remember though. My sister, and that Blood Knight trainee.

I was wandering around feeling sorry for myself when this white fox came up to me and licked my hand and just stared at me. I was perplexed. I had never really been too fond of animals before, but there was something different about this fox. I felt an instant bond with him, and we became fast friends. He would follow me everywhere I went. It was soon after that I decided to train to become a hunter. I didn't need the physical strength as a Blood Knight, and I could stand back from my enemy.

This first journal entry does not even begin to describe me and my troubles, I know this, but it's a start. It did feel good to get some things out, even if no one else is going to read this. Maybe I will even look for that blonde Blood Knight. What was her name again? Oh that's right.....Kyliska Sunblade.......

A chance encounter

Tiandril Sunsilk sat in a bar in Silvermoon drinking away his troubles. Actually since the curse that was put on him made his memory pretty foggy, he didn't really have many troubles as of late to drink away! He just liked to drink. He had a nice buzz going and he was feeling very relaxed. And that is when a beautiful blonde Blood Knight walked into the bar and sat down a few seats away from him, not even looking at him. Tiandril almost didn't give her a second glance, but then he realized that he knew her. This was Kyliska Sunblade, the Blood Knight that he had trained with and he could never get out of his mind since then. He slowly inched his way to the seat next to her and smiled at her. She gave a quick smile back to him but then looked away and ordered a drink. She then took the drink and gulped it down, much like a man would do and ordered another one. Tiandril smiled at that. We will get along just fine I think he thought to himself.

"Barkeep, please put the beautiful lady's next drink on my tab please." Tiandril said with bravado. Kyliska turned to him and smiled again, this time a little wider.

"Why thank you. That is very kind of you." She said and gulped down the next drink. She could feel Tiandril staring at her. "Is there something I can help you with?"

"Oh no, I was just wondering if you remembered me, I suppose not by your reaction." Tiandril started. "My name is Tiandril Sunsilk and we were in Blood Knight training together."

Kyliska took a moment to really take a good look at him. There was a blank look on her face but then suddenly there was a glimmer of recognition on her face. And if Tiandril wasn't mistaken, it looked like she had a slight blush to her cheeks at the rememberance. He slightly smirked and laughed.

"Ti, I do remember you. I also remember that you quit all of a sudden without a word as to why!" She stated as she hit him softly on the shoulder. "I was so mad that you just left before we really got to know each other. And to be honest, I had a little crush on you so it really did hit me hard." She paused and then said "And please, call me Kyli."

Tiandril took Kylli's hand in his and held it to his lips and gave it a soft kiss. "I am very sorry for leaving on such short notice, and I am equally surprised that you had a crush on me, because as it turns out, I also had one for you as well!" They both smiled at each other. A few moments had gone by without either of them saying a word, just staring at each other. Then the barkeep came back and refreshed their drinks.

Kyli gently took her hand away, not realizing that Ti was still holding it. Her face flushed again, and then she started to feel guilty as her thoughts drifted to Andithiel. It was just so strange to see Ti after so long, and her feelings for him creeping back up onto her as if it were yesterday that they were in training. He sure was as handsome as he was back then, if not more so. He seemed very sure of himself and of his good looks. He could obviously tell that Kyli still harbored some feelings for him.

"Um, Ti....I think I should tell you that I am involved with someone." Kyli said.

"Oh that is quite alright. I plan on winning you over to my side." Ti said as he smiled slyly. Again Kyli blushed as her body betrayed what her words were saying. Ti gently put a hand on her shoulder and she stiffened. She wasn't sure what he was about to do, but he just leaned over and kissed her cheek slightly. "It was very nice to see you today Kyli, and I do hope that we will meet again." With that he stood up and left Kyli sitting with her mouth slightly open watching him as he left the bar.

This is not going to end well she thought.

Jealousy

(This story was written by Andithiel)

Andithiel casually walked through the lower halls of Felo’melorn Spire ultimately leading to the Grand Hall. In his left hand he carried a small bouquet of roses in which had been prepared by one of the House botanist earlier that day. House Felo’melorn had many new faces inside its walls these days with the recent changes in its political structure.  The old alliances of House Sunfire and House Dawnsea were abolished at the demand of Selenthiel once she arose as Magistrix of the House. For reasons still unknown to himself, his sister had convinced him this was the right course…even if it meant causing more strain between himself and Kyliska. He had not had the time to visit his love once Selenthiel began to reform the House as she continued to utilize his skill in training new guardsmen and archers for the spire, even after he had heard that Kyliska had returned to Silvermoon recently from her expedition to Pandaria. He glanced down to his left hand and smiled, certainly she would appreciate the flowers let alone be surprised to see him.

Before leaving the Grand Hall, his sister Selenthiel caught his eye as she stood with a small group of Sin’Dorei  wearing red and golden tabards , each one containing the shape of a golden firehawk on the front. “Sunreavers?” he asked himself and almost stopped in curiosity but knew that politics would most certainly be involved and decided to leave it to his sister and continued to walk toward the main entrance of the spire. He walked with haste past the group, which gave little to no recognition of his presence. He passed through the main entrance that lead to the out courtyard, revealing 4 hawkstriders, each one accompanied with 2 guards that  wore tabards that resembled the same from earlier before. His curiosity grew more but continued on towards the military district of Silvermoon.

Walking past the many of street vendors and their gawking servants and commoners, he made his way to Farstrider Square knowing he would find Kyliska training. Rounding the corner on the street revealed the training grounds and a multitude of Sin’Dorei trainees…both Blood Knight and Farstrider recruits, practicing their skill on the training dummies located throughout the grounds. He scoured the training grounds to where there was the most activity , presuming his love would already be hard at practice. Finding Kyliska among the crowd of recruits would not be hard at all , as in the past he had always noticed a crowd of them would congregate around her in observation , watching her moves in hope to help themselves with possibly introducing some new attacks that they could apply themselves and of course, Kyliska always gladly offered  her help . This time however, there was no such crowd.  His eyes continued to scan the grounds for her, presuming she had already departed  he prepared to turn back and make his way towards House Sunfire but came across a man and a woman talking  behind a training dummy. He took a few steps closer in their direction and immediately could make out Kyliska . Her blonde hair was somewhat messy and her face was flushed, presumably from her training but her posture said something else. Kyliska’s face was filled with emotion but what he was not sure. Andithiel started to walk up thinking the man may have been bothering her but quickly stopped dead in his pace as he watched the man pull Kyliska in for a hug. Andithiel’s heart stopped.

He continued to watch in shock as the brief hug was interrupted as Kyliska slowly pushed him away. Never before had he had to worry about other men with her. He had always known Kyliska was a fierce woman, she lived by the moment and most of all, she lived by her sword. His head began to race with questions, possibilities and of course…jealousy. Andithiel could feel his left grip tighten around the stem of the bouquet of roses he had intended to give to her as he continued to watch the two talk. 

“I do not understand…who is this man and what gives him the right to lean into you in such a way?” he asked himself aloud.

Andithiel began to grow even more frustrated as his questions turned into presumptions of his own accord and looked away from the two and closed his eyes. Within moments he could feel his self control returning and slowly looked in the direction of where Kyliska and this stranger stood only to see the two walk off into the distance, leaving Andithiel with a blank expression on his face. “I see why now sister on why you refrain from getting involved into relationships with nobles from other Houses.” He said to himself as he shook his head with displeased expression. He turned around to see Felo’melorn Spire off into the distance and departed.

Journal Entry November 3, 2010

Andi has fallen under my spell. Well not a spell per se, but he is in love with me. I didn't even have to do much. I do not know if he would help me in my task of getting precious Alliance intel from him, but I can try. I think it might be too soon to ask these things of him now. I must be sure that he is totally in love with me before trying to get information from him.

He seems like such a pure soul. In some ways I feel bad for trying to corrupt him. I must better our people though and protect them from the Alliance. I have already caused a rift between him and his sister. He seems totally devoted to me for some reason. He would go against what his sister is telling him to be with me. I still find this strange. He says she sees good in me, I'm not sure if it is there. I have some some very terrible things in my life. Unforgiveable things. He accepts me for who I am though. He also doesn't seem to care that I have tried to kill his sister on many occasions. If someone tried to kill Biara I do not think I could even be friends with them, let alone start a relationship with them!

Andi does say the sweetest things to me though Journal! It makes me feel wonderful to hear those things. I do not get complimented often, so even if it is from a Kaldorei it warms my heart. I find my thoughts drifting to him throughout the day. I do not know why. Does this mean I am starting to feel something for him? I surely do not hope so! I will not become my mother. I will not repeat her mistakes. I will keep this purely professional. I will continue with my plan and not get attached!

Journal Entry November 4, 2010

My heart and mind are so confused right now. I spent the night with Andi under the stars again. Why does he make me feel this way? I set out to use him as a spy to get information from the Alliance and I end up having feelings for him? I of course didn't tell him my original plan, he would never forgive me. He said he loves me. I am not in love with him, but I care very deeply for him. I guess pretending to like him at first solidified my feelings for real? No one can know of this. Biara must still think I am following our plan. I will be branded a traitor before they even know the truth. That I could NEVER betray my people. I will NOT become my mother in that respect.

But why does history feel the need to repeat itself with a Sin'dorei falling in love with a Kaldorei? Why can't I just find another Sin'dorei that I could settle down with. Afterall I really just want to fall in love and be loved back. But if I really am falling in love with Andi, how can we ever be seen in public together? I would be shunned from Silvermoon. I do not know if I could handle that, I love that city so much. It is apart of me.

I am still very upset that my mother did what she did, but it's times like this when I wish she were still alive. I could tell her anything. She never judged me. She just listened to me, and tried to give me advice on what I should do. I cry as I write this because I do not know what to do. My heart is saying one thing and my brain is saying another. Which do I listen to? I'm trying so hard to do the right thing here. Andi is being very understanding. I am just so confused...

*There are some tear stains on the page*

Journal Entry November 6, 2010

I am very happy today. I hadn't been fighting for the past few weeks. I just didn't feel like myself. I had not fought well one night and it weighed heavily on my heart. My sister and some friends had to attack Redridge because the Alliance were attacking us so we had to retaliate. I decided to go with her because I didn't want her to get hurt. It turned out to be a glorious night though! My skills were better than ever, maybe the rest was just what I needed. We had Lore healing us which was a great thing too! I do not even remember all of the people that came with us but it was a very successful night indeed. Many Alliance died by our hands. I also saw Lune. We fought each other for much of the night. I wonder how Andi would feel about that.

Andi. My thoughts turn to him. I have not spoken with him since our night together the other night. We talked so much about so many things, and now nothing. I am not blaming him, I feel like maybe it was too intense and we both needed a break from speaking and seeing each other. We opened up our hearts to each other. That can be painful. I went to our spot in Eversong last night and just sat looking out at the ocean. It is so peaceful there. I could almost feel him there with me. I ended up falling asleep there from sheer exhaustion from my fighting.

I awoke renewed today. I feel more like my old self than I have in ages. I know Andi is very understanding but I do not know how he will handle me fighting with Lune last night. I did not know she would be there and I was quite surprised to see her though. It wasn't like I sought out to fight just her. Maybe I can talk to him later...

Journal Entry November 8, 2010

This weekend was filled with fighting. I relished in the feeling I got during battle. I missed it so. I am still on a high from how well we did. I also ran into some unfriendly Draenei yesterday. I flew to Kargath and was walking along when I saw Mariskka and Lelliel coming towards me. They surprised me since I had no idea why they were there. Mariskka claimed she "saw" that I was going to attack some dwarves or something. I think she just likes to spout lies. She also told me some disturbing things about my sister. She said she had visions about her and how she was going to become a cultist. I did not believe a word of it. I think she was trying to make a rift between me and Biara, but it didn't work! She even sent an elemental after me. That wench!

I did see something strange though. Lelliel had a darkness about her while I was fighting Mariskka. I found that rather odd. She said she still has the light but from what I saw it wasn't light at all. Also I fear they have found out about my bloodthistle addiction. Lelliel had taken out the plant and I could not take my eyes off of it. They noticed this and taunted me with it until I almost hit Lelliel again. They would not leave, but I got so angry. Velmara was also there with me healing me. She is a good friend. I know she still has some to learn in the way of healing but she did quite well. I'm glad I had someone on my side to fight against those two wenches!

On another note, I have not seen or heard from Andi in quite some time. I fear that he is not pleased with me. We had a nice night under the stars together but I have not heard from him since then. Have I done something wrong? I just wanted to be truthful with him about my feelings, I hope I did not upset him. I do not want to seem pushy so I will stay back until he contacts me. He will not be pleased to hear of my encounter with Mariskka and Lelliel, and about fighting his sister the other night too. I am almost afraid to tell him...

Edit Journal Entry November 12, 2010

Last night was interesting. Hauk has been helping me with my Bloodthistle withdrawal. I knew this would not be easy when he said he would help me. I sometimes feel as if I am not strong enough to handle this. I have tried before and I ended up stabbing my sister. I warned Hauk of this but he wants to still help me. I even pushed him a bit and he still wouldn't leave my side. He wants to see me through this which I appreciate so much. He is such a great friend to me. He took me to the training dummies in Silvermoon to let out my aggression. It helped a little bit but I fought so hard that I think I passed out.

I had the strangest dream last night. Hauk and I were in Eversong by the water. He was saying the niecest things to me. He was saying everything I have ever hoped he would say to me. That he loved me and we could be together. We even kissed! It felt so real at first. My heart was so full of love and I have never felt better. Then something happened and I realized that it wasn't real. He tried to assure me that it was, and that I could go back there anytime I wanted to as long as I still consumed the Bloodthistle.

He would always love me in my drug induced world, in this fake place that I had made up. The idea was tempting. To finally have Hauk love me in return. I wish it was real. It never will be real. My heart has already started to move on, on to Andi. I have to fight this addiction that I have, it is no good for me. My addiction to Bloodthistle, as well as Hauk Fenshire. It isn't fair to Andi, I was honest with him about my feelings for another and he seemed upset but seemed to understand. My heart is sad this morning.

I awoke in Sunsword Spire. Hauk must have taken me there after I passed out. I woke up to the sound of the ocean. I left early this morning to go back home. I hope today is better with the withdrawal. Hauk seems to think it will get worse before it gets better. I am not looking forward to this...

Journal Entry November 16, 2010

So much judgement last night. People always judge my sister and I. It is sad that even other Sin'Dorei cannot see what we see, cannot agree with what we are doing. They just want peace. They want to just defend our lands, but this cannot always be the case. Sometimes we must go on the offensive. We must attack to protect the ones we love. This is in my blood, what I have trained for. Yes I might take it too far with my blood lust, I cannot always be held accountable for what I do once that overtakes me. It can be quite dangerous. Even my most trusted allies know to give me some space during battle so I do not hurt them in my blind rage.

I know I willl die in battle, that is my calling. If I were to die any other way it would be a disgrace. These earthquakes are really rattling me. I was in Orgrimmar last night and they kept happening. There are not many things that scare me, but for some reason the earth shaking like that uncontrollably unnerves me to no end. I can handle fighting the Alliance, and other foes, but these earthquakes are not good. I do hope they stop soon. I'm very greatful that they are not happening in Silvermoon, at least I can get some rest there. Also there were fire elementals in Orgrimmar last night. What is going on with these elementals? We must put a stop to it! 

*a stream of consciousness*

Kyliska could hear waves crashing. She could not see anything, she did not know why. Was this real? Where was she? Why could she not move her body? The pain was unbearable. She vaguely remembered the events of last night. Terrible things happened. Biara. Biara tried to kill her. She had caught Kyli and Andi together kissing, and she overreacted. She had called her a traitor, just like her mother. She slapped Kyli and then Andi came to her defense and shot at Biara, and that is when Biara threw Kyli off the cliff. Was it an accident? Did Biara mean to do that? Kyli didn't know. Hauk and Noxu rode up as well. Kyli remembered that the last thing she saw as she was thrown off the cliff was Hauk shooting Andi dead.

Kyliska felt something wet on her body, it must be water she thought. She tried to will her eyes to open but it was hard. She was barely breathing, and exerting any extra energy was not a good idea.  It was so cold. Her whole body was soaked. Had she fallen in the water after being shot by Biara? After she had fallen, she didn't remember anything. Kyli's heart was breaking, her sister didn't love her, Andi was dead, Hauk and Noxu probably hated her as well. If she lived through this she would have no one.

Kyli's heart started to beat slower. She almost welcomed death. She had nothing to live for anymore. Anyone who cared for her was either dead or would hate her when they found out about her relationship with Andi. The only true regret was the way she was going to die. She always thought it would be during battle, not like this. Fighting to protect her people and the ones she loved. Her last thought was hoping that Biara could forgive her, and know in her heart that Kyli was not a traitor even if she did fall in love with a Kaldorei.

Journal Entry November 22, 2010

 The last few days have been strange. So much has happened, I don't even know where to start. My heart is broken. My sister almost killed me. I do not know what to do. I was near death and Hauk found me last night. I do not know how I can ever repay him for that. He had been searching for me, I'm so glad he was. He brought me to Light's Hope Chapel last night. The healers here are wonderful. I almost feel like myself again! I have a scar on my stomach from the magic Biara cast on me. The healers said that they could remove it if I wanted them to, but I said no. I need to keep it to remember what happened. It will remind me to think of the consequences of my actions.

I now know that it was wrong of me to try to seduce Andi as a way to learn secrets from the Alliance. I did not stay detached and it cost him his life, and almost mine as well. Andi is dead. It feels so strange to even write those words. I loved him. I didn't think I would, but I did. Did I even tell him that? Did he know before he died? I hope so. I know I didn't want to admit it to him, or myself at first, but it was true. Should I seek out Lune to pay my respects? No, that probably would not be a good idea. I will let it be for now.

I asked Hauk to get my ax for me, I will resume my training when I feel better. My mother's necklace was also gone, it must have fallen off when I was thrown off the cliff. I just feel so empty now. My sister hates me, my love is dead, I do not even want to go back to Silvermoon. Andi, I am so sorry for everything I have done. I hope that wherever you are that you can forgive me....

The Shattering

Kyliska stood outside Light's Hope Chapel and smiled. The past few months seemed to fly by. She had been staying there ever since Hauk had rescued her from near death. The Argent Crusade rebuilt Light's Hope Chapel and Kyli had been helping. They had healed her when Hauk brought her there and she just never left. She saw their effort in rebuilding the area and decided to help them out. She was allied with them and wanted to show her support. She heard about everything that happened all around Azeroth. She had not been able to go out and see all of the damage because she was helping out here. She was going to go and lend as much help as she could to her allies.

Kyli sighed as her thoughts turned to Biara. She had not even reached out to her. She looked down at her bracelet that she used to communicate with her. It was slightly burned and didn't work, but she still wore it. She wanted to find Biara to make sure she was ok after everything had happened. She had heard that Silvermoon wasn't affected but she had to make sure. She didn't know how Biara would react to her actually being alive. Would she be mad that Kyli didn't come to find her sooner? Would she be happy to see her sister again? Kyli herself wasn't sure how she was going to feel seeing her again. She still had mixed feelings about what happened. She didn't know if Biara had tried to kill her on purpose or if it was an accident. She had to find out.

Kyli's thoughts also turned to Andi a lot. She wondered what he would have been doing now if he were alive. Would he have even lived through the Shattering as people were calling it? She had heard rumors that Darkshore was destroyed. She wondered if Lune was still alive. Kyli missed Andi more than words could say. She felt incredible guilt over his death, she was the true cause of it. Working with the Argent Crusade helped keep her mind off of it, but it was times like this when she had nothing to do that her mind wandered. She tried to keep as busy as possible. Hard labor is just what Kyli needed after she was healed. She lightlyl touched the scar on her stomach, she would always look at that scar and be reminded of what happened that day. If only she could change things. She would have done so much differently. 

A Surprise Ship

Kyliska was trying to collect her thoughts. She had not heard from Andi in a while, he had wanted to meet but something came up and they were not able to. Kyli could feel herself becoming more distant from him. Ever since they both found out the other was alive they had not really seen each other. It broke her heart to not see him, but maybe it was for the best. He had something to tell her, and she knew he wanted to fight for the Alliance now. Maybe they would see each other on the battlefield. It pained her to even think about that.

Kyli walked down by the docks in Silvermoon. Sometimes she liked to walk by the water because it calmed her. To hear the waves come crashing upon the shore, the smell of the sea air, just everything about it relaxed her. As she approached the dock, her breath caught in her throat. Kyli turned pale and felt suddenly sick to her stomach. She saw a ship in the harbor. A ship that she had not seen in many years. With tears in her eyes she saw the flag on the ship. It was the Sunblade flag but different. This was one of her father's ships, The Golden Blade. But there were none left. Not since the scourge attacks. Kyli looked as if she had seen a ghost. She could not beleive her eyes.

Suddenly the Dayfire Dock Captain came running towards Kyli. She turned around slowly still in shock at seeing her father's ship in the harbor.

"Lady Sunblade! Lady Sunblade!" he exclaimed.

"Yes, what is the matter?" Kyliska stated.

"Someone is here to see you." he started. "She claims to be your cousin, Celessarae Sunblade. She seems rather interested in speaking with you. I told her I would come find you right away!"

Kyliska drew in a breath. Cele, could this be? Kyli thought that she was dead. She had not heard from her since the Scourge attacks. Could it be that she took her father's ship and that is why it has the Sunblade banner flying from it? Her cousin is alive? Her only true blood relative is alive? Kyli felt as if she had seen a ghost. Her head started to hurt as she fully comprehended this information.

"Where is she now?"

"She is in some tavern in Silvermoon I believe. I think she almost started a bar fight the other day!"

Kyliska laughed. That was Cele alright. "I will see to her, thank you for delivering her message."

The Dock Captain nodded and walked away. Kyliska slowly made her way towards Silvermoon City again. She had to meet with her dear cousin. They had a lot to talk about. Like where has she been all this time? Why did she steal her father's ship? Why had she not tried to contact Kyli in all this time? Kyli sighed and then a slow smile started to form on her lips. She did miss her cousin. They had some fun times together. Afterall it was Cele that got Kyli into drinking all those years ago. Yes she would go find her cousin in the bar that she was hanging out in. Maybe they could re-live some of those times again....

Journal Entry January 12, 2011

Last night was one of the best nights! Andi and I were together all night. I had not seen him in so long, so just seeing him lifted my spirits! Having him hold me in his tight embrace made all of my fears and worries disappear.  We did talk about some issues such as him fighting for the Alliance. I am still a little concerned over that. I do not wish to fight him, I don't even know how I could. I warned him that when I am in battle I lose my mind, I would most likely hurt him before I even realized it was him. I wish things could be different, but some day we will most likely have to face each other on the battle field. I will try not to think about that for now though. We talked and were open with each other, and that is what matters most.

It seemed like we talked forever with him just holding me. I was so content. Then something more happened. We started to kiss and then one thing led to another and we made love. It was so magical. I've been with other men before but I do not think I have ever been in love with the man I made love to. It was a totally different experience altogether! I cannot seem to stop smiling today. I can only hope that Andi feels the same way. He seemed happy when I left him this morning.  I hope that not too much time passes before we can see each other again.

Any doubts that I had about our feelings for one another are totally gone now. We love each other completely. We can figure out everything else. We have conquered so much together, even death. I feel like now, everything is the way it is supposed to be. I can say with all honesty that I am happy. Nothing can take this feeling away from me.

*LIttle hearts are drawn on this Journal entry*

Journal Entry, September 8, 2010

A lot has been going on lately. I don't even know why I'm writing in here. I do not even know how much to trust you with my secrets! I'm glad some issues were resolved though such as Biara being out of jail, and she is friends with Hauk again! I am no longer in the middle of their dispute! Also Sirian is cured! I knew that spell was a bad idea but he begged me, I couldn't say no. I know it didn't work out how he had wanted, him forgetting me completely and me forgetting him, but everything seems ok now. We are in a good place it seems. I don't know where this will go, I do not even know him that well. I haven't trusted him with all of my secrets. There are some that only a few know. I would like to keep it that way.

If this secret were to get out, it would be the death of me. No one would look at me the same way again. I would be ruined. I know some would not care so much but there are other s who would never talk to me again, and I do not know if I could bear that. Especially now I need my friends and what family I have left to be on my side. I just hope that this stays hidden until or if I even want people to know.

I had a great time fighting the Alliance last night at least! And then being with Sirian last night was also a joy. I feel lonely when he is not around. Is this yet another addiction that I have? The alcohol, the magic, drugs, men, it is all an addiction I suppose. But what is wrong with that anyway? Ahhh journal I must be going now. Thanks for listening as always.

Journal entry September 9, 2010

Oh Journal, Biara is mad at me! I'm still not entirely sure why she got so mad. So Sirian is making some things in his labs. The one herb he had given me and Ali is not a bad thing, it just helps out in some ways! As long as Ali went to him first and he didn't drug her with it, I don't see what the problem is! Biara is starting to go against all of these things that I love to do. She is not a fan of my drinking I know, and she doesn't like the overuse of magic anymore. She HATES any kinds of herbs that alter your mind. I do not see a problem with any of this though. It's all for a good time! I'm not over using any of it, so I think I'm alright.

Sirian left Silvermoon last night I heard. I do not know where he went. I tried looking for him because I told Biara I would talk to him. I want to find out if Ali went to him for that drug. I will find out the truth of this situation!

Journal Entry late September 9, 2010

 I don't usually write two journal entries in one day but I had to talk to someone. I have no one to talk to right now. My heart is in shambles yet again. I feel like this is starting to become a common place thing for me. Why do I not deserve to be happy? Am I not worthy of love? I am a thing to be used and thrown away when they are done with me. I just.....I don't know what to do. There IS nothing to do. I just want to love someone and have them return my love. Did I love Sirian? I do not know. I cared for him deeply, but was it love, or just lust? I know I feel terrible pain right now though. I knew that spell was a bad idea, Biara had warned me and I in turn warned Sirian. He wouldn't listen to me. He wanted to forget his wife. I couldn't bear to see that sadness in his eyes so I went through with the spell. The spell that eventually tore us apart.

Maybe I should just be alone for a while. It seems like there is one bad thing that happens after another for me. When will it end? I cannot take much more. To find out about my past, and my mother, that was almost too much to bear. It still doesn't seem real. It doesn't make sense. I am not who everyone thinks I am. I am not who "I" think I am. I do not know who or what I am. No one could ever love me. How could they? I am tainted. Maybe they have sensed that, maybe that is the true problem. There is no way to cleanse myself of this taint though. I must live with it. Live with this secret or tell everyone and risk shame. Risk losing my home. Risk losing my sister and dear friends. How could they accept me? I don't even want to accept me.

I think I will go get a drink, and drown my sorrows. I do not want to feel right now. I don't care what I feel, I just wish to feel nothing...